I am nearing retirement. No more
extensions of service. Just three months to go and I feel lost already. My
workplace doubled up for my social circle and I now realize how much I have
drifted away from the Tambrahms in Jamshedpur. I remember the time some twenty
five years ago when I would take out the clay figurines from my mother in law's
trunk, all wrapped up in newspaper, wipe them clean and arrange them in the
shelf of the only bedroom of our modest home and invite neighbors for
"golu" during Navaratri. We had quite a few Tamilians in our
neighborhood and we'd invite a few Bihari friends as well. It was a simple get
together. I would also get invited to Lalitha Sahasranamam Bhajan sessions in
the afternoons during Navaratri, 'haldi- kumkum' would be exchanged. We did not
have a telephone connection and mobile phones were unheard of. Friends were
invited personally with the daughters going from house to house with kumkum
containers to extend the invitation. Initially people would be asked to come
over on any or all of the nine days of Navaratri but later one restricted the
invitation to specific days so that they were free to visit others on the
remaining days.
Friends from college were invited
home for lunch. We did not own a dining table or fancy cutlery. They gladly
squatted on the floor and enjoyed a typical Tambrahm meal, were treated to
filter coffee and a stroll in the neighboring park. I suffered no complex or
inhibitions and was happy to be just 'myself '.
Then times changed. I decided to
pursue my studies and enrolled myself for a Masters program in a local college
and my excellent results prompted me to register for Ph.D. The subject of my
Ph. D thesis was an annual crop that grew around Navaratri season. Thereafter
Navaratri celebrations were shelved and the "golu bommais" - clay
figurines that my mother in law had carefully preserved for years and my own
addition to the lot each year were shifted to the loft and have remained there
ever since we moved to our three bedroom apartment. I still got invited for
"golu" but with old friends having left town or relocated elsewhere
and not being acquainted with newcomers I seem to know fewer and fewer people.
And all this when I can now connect through mobile phones and social/virtual
apps.
But that was not the reason. I
seemed to be happy socializing with my friends in college and was equally happy
to relax at home during the puja break. But this Navaratri I seem to miss my
initial days in Jamshedpur. Of course I do my bit by giving gifts of bangles
and bindis to little girls in my neighborhood and visiting elderly ladies to
seek their blessings. But with modest means I seemed to have derived more
satisfaction then, even if it was just "sundal" wrapped in newspaper
that I distributed. All the ziplock bags and aluminum foils that I can now
afford seem meaningless.
While folding clothes this
evening I was in an introspective mood and found myself wondering what I had
gained or lost over the years. I hold on to expensive silk saris that I haven't
worn in years knowing full well that my children would dump them without a
thought. Maintaining them is a responsibility. But each of those are either reminders
of the occasion of their purchase or I am reminded of the person who gifted
them to me.
I feel that I was perhaps wrong
in excluding myself from a social life that involved person to person
interaction during festive occasions like Navaratri. This was a tried and
tested method that was the lifeline of society and the only method of
socializing particularly for women who were mainly homemakers. It also brought
out their creativity and one was treated to colorful rangolis, bhajans and of
course yummy snacks! I truly want to start organizing " golu" again.
I wonder if it's too late in the day to revive the practice. No harm trying isn't it?
Happy Navaratri to all of you!
