Saturday, December 13, 2008

A 'doctor' in the family....

I have some good news to share.Daughter no.2 has completed her Ph.D work and is ready to file for her degree. I had already confessed that I am a really stupid mother and I forgot to wish her before the D day,ie the day she defended her work. It was very comforting to know that her parents in law called her up to wish her. Sorry my child, I remembered you the day before and forgot about it right when it mattered.I am sure it wasn't easy. During her stint in Graduate school, she had two children and how she managed home and college is beyond my understanding. Hat's off to her and her husband who made it possible.

I go back in time to the days when my children were school going kids. I had always noticed that my 1st daughter Priya and son Rahul were easily distracted and were not putting in their best but my second daughter Prasanna was very focussed and worked hard. So even if her hard work did not translate into marks I'd let her off but would scold the other two for being careless and threaten to send them to a 'dabba' school in our neighborhood if they did not improve. This somehow bothered Prasanna who felt hurt at not being scolded.

'Does it mean that mummy does not expect me to do well?' she's supposed to have thought and that motivated her to work harder. The hard work she put in and perseverance that she showed had perhaps become a habit and helped her achieve her goal. Having done my Ph. D. I can understand how frustrating and difficult it can get when week after week goes by and one has no results to show. I often wondered why research in any subject results in a doctorate in Philosophy. I now understand. The experience is such that one learns to take the good, bad and ugly experiences with a smile and a philosophical attitude automatically sets in. In my case the Ranchi University added to my problems in its own way and made me a true follower of the Bhagawad geeta. 'Do your duty without worrying about results'..smile.....beam.....Never crib and complain!

Be it as it may, my daughter is planning a trip to India before starting some post doctoral work and we are looking forward to some quality time with her. She truly deserves to get away from her lab and research work and freak out as her own generation would say.

16 comments:

Joy said...

Congratulations to Prasanna and you. PhD surely requires patience, hard work and perseverance. I have 2 PhDs in my family and a close friend of mine who is pursuing too. I am always humbled by the amount of effort they put in.

rajk said...

Congratulations to your daughter! And you too for having such fine children. And that was a nice explanation for "Doctor of Philosophy", never thought like that before! Good one!

Kavitha said...

Hi HHGM,
This is my first comment here, though I have always been following your blog! Needless to say that I have always enjoyed reading it :)

This particular post did give me an answer as to why is a PhD called PhD! I was really curious to know it as I have just started pursuing one and am beginning to understand what you said!

Congrats to your daughter on my behalf :)

Tys on Ice said...

:) ... congrats to your daughter...managing 2 kids, a household and doing this...kudos...

kudos to you also for your part in raising a daughter like that

Mampi said...

Wow,
I still have to defend mine and I cannot wait for it to happen. Been a long time since I gave my precious thesis to the university.

Raghu said...

Phd?? ooo... my dad couldnt force me to do even my masters - forget the next line of hurdle! :)

Congratulations to your daughter!

Hip Grandma said...

Joy:thanks Joy.i'll pass on your wishes.

rajk:Thanks.I feel happier now than I did when my own Ph.D. work was completed.

kavitha:welcome here.My best wishes to you on your endeavor.As for the coming years,be prepared for setbacks.they are part of your research work.Never get upset.When you least expect it you will get a breakthrough.Thanks for your wishes.

tys on ice:Thanx.My only role in shaping my kids was to let them be.i've been accused of being too easy going.But I'm not sure if my children agree.

mampi:Towards the end one does feel like the way you do.'Just be done with it' is what one thinks.In India we have to wait long for the examiner's report to arrive and more often than not the report reaches the wrong person and one has to sweat it out to locate it.Good luck to you too.

raghu:Pursuing a Ph.D degree can be frustrating.may be you were right in opting out of it.As long as you have a good job what difference does it make?Thanx all the same.

eve's lungs said...

Congratulations dear P . And you have done a good job raising such fine children .

Itchingtowrite said...

congrats

dipali said...

Hearty Congrats to your daughter!
Liked your reason for the PhD being universally in Philosophy:))

starry nights said...

Congrats to your daughter and to you too.It is the values you taught her that made her work hard and follow her dreams.

kurrodu said...

Congrats to your daughter... It's a great achievement..

Hip Grandma said...

eve's lung:Thanks mallika.maybe I could but having seen a neighbor's son at very close quarters I have started believing that fate plays a big role in shaping our lives.

ITW:Thanks.

Dipali:Thanks.i'll pass on your message to her for sure.As for a doc in Philosophy there can be no other explanation.The frustration that is part of research work is unbelivable.

lalitha:Thanks a lot.

korrudu:Thanks.Ph.D. work is quite exhausting and requires a lot of patience.

Usha said...

I can see how proud you are of your daughter's achievement and justifiably so. Please pass on my heartiest congratulations to prasanna. :)

Hip Grandma said...

Usha:i sure will.

hillgrandmom said...

Congratulations to your doctor :)
I hope you all have a lovely time when she comes home!