Saturday, October 26, 2013

Of this and that

My vacation is almost over and in less than a fortnight I'll be back in India. It has been a pleasant stay - interacting with grandchildren, getting to know them better and generally relaxing. The only sore area was the fact that we were dependent on others to be taken around. Except for a fortnight spent before my second daughter shifted to her own house, we had no shopping areas near the places we stayed and were pretty much on house arrest during the week and if it weren't for two sets of grandchildren who were having their summer vacations we would have had nothing to do. 

We got to spend around three weeks with my son after a gap of more than 10 years. His visits to India just for two weeks including travel time and on his last visit he had spent just four days at home since he had to finalize the purchase of an apartment in Bangalore. On earlier visits to the US he was either studying or we had a lot of baby sitting to do so we visited him during a weekend and rushed back. It was a pleasure to relive the time when he was in India and also to see that he had not changed in the years gone by. I have given an account of an imaginary conversation with him in this post. This should explain why I miss the lively conversations and light - hearted banter that I used to enjoy with my children before they flew the nest.

Returning to my niche is something I look forward to. But I am also going to sorely miss my children and grandchildren. I sometimes wish we could return to the time when they were small, school goers and I did not have to worry about my blood pressure and arthritis. I remember my mother saying something to this effect during one of her visits to Jamshedpur. I had not understood her words then. I do now. And this makes me long for the days when I was my mother's daughter. She was a person I could turn to in my moments of distress and trust on her to give an unbiased advice and assure me that all would be well.

 'Bad times don't last forever' was her famous refrain. 

Unfortunately good times too do not last forever. So perhaps the best thing to do would be to enjoy the moment without worrying about the past and future.

Returning to a house that had been locked for more than 4 months and setting it in order is bad enough. I have to deal with some repair work too. The day we were leaving, around 4:30 in the morning, a part of the bathroom terrace (about 2 meters in diameter) fell off - plaster, concrete, cement - and we had no time to attend to it. In the process it had crashed into the washbasin and shattered it. We are lucky that it did not crash on our heads. I keep wondering if there has been further damage and now that we have to return I keep worrying about how it may be fixed. I hear that it has been raining heavily in Jamshedpur  which means that the seepage in the wall might have increased and repair work may not be immediately possible. 

So as you see though I know that I need to enjoy the moment I cannot help worrying about these little and not so little problems. Selfish I may sound but I cannot help wanting to return to my childhood when I had the older generation to take care of such things.

Be it as it may, let me enjoy the remaining week of my stay in America and enjoy Deepavali with my children and grandchildren which is again a pleasure that I hope to get after 13 years.

A happy Deepavali to all of you.

@ Dipali: Sorry for stealing your blog name.


Sri said...


Wish you a Happy Diwali in advance!

Enjoy the precious time with your children and grand you rightly mentioned-Nothing lasts forever!

Dotm said...

Hi, This is Dot. I just received your note giving me your phone number. Happy to hear about the enjoyment with your son and grandchildren. Sorry to hear about the home re-pairs waiting at home for you.
I am wondering if where your son lives is in the same time zone as where I live . If not, I need to know the difference so I will know what time it is here when it is between 10am and 3pm where you are now. I can probably find it on the net, but need to be sure it is Chicago, Illinois where you are visiting, or not.

Hip Grandma said...

I am now back in maryland so the time zone should be the same as yours.

Hip Grandma said...

The above comment was for DotM.

Sri: you sre right. It is the present that matters.

Anonymous said...

Happy deepawali to you !

I too push myself to think, live the moment that is all that matters. Easy said than done, though.

Only if I knew yesterday what I have today.

It's nice to spent time with kids for a while,when they are in midst of stress of perhaps the same circle , we were in at one time. And we do know each one handles it, the best way he/she can.

Only the wise know how fortunate to get some moments together , when physically time and distance both seem to be far and away. Enjoy the timeandspace when are as close as this.


Anonymous said...

Very true HHG. We did not understand our parent's words when they said they longed for our younger ages. We understand them only when we come to their place :) Anyway Happy Diwali :)

hillgrandmom said...

Looks like you went to India, just when I came here. i do hope your house repairs were not too bad. We go back after two months.